Cheers to Perfection

The world wants us to be extroverts. I had a hard time growing up as an introvert. People don’t let you BE if you’re an introvert, they bang on the door continuously, trying to coax you out of your shell, as if you’re inept and need saving. As if extroverts are more valuable to the world. The banging leaves you with nothing but a headache.

I’m not sure that a person who is fundamentally introverted can be re-molded into an extrovert. They can pretend to be one with immense effort, but doing that can lead to immense unhappiness. Extroverted, organized, logical thinkers are prized in society over introverted, free-rolling creative thinkers. And here’s the problem: if you’re inherently introverted and you witness the world in praise of extroverts all through your life, it’s instilled in you that THEY ARE BETTER and you should seriously consider changing.

And so I did change. And now, if you meet me, you’ll find it difficult to classify me as either an introvert or an extrovert. I’m trapped dead in the middle between these two. It feels uncomfortable at times.
There are moments when the introvert in me is listening to myself speaking as a third person. My voice sounds unnaturally loud, my hands should be at my side rather than flailing around making gestures in front of me, my attitude should be less arrogant.
And the extrovert that’s now a part of me is disappointed if I don’t react quickly and cleverly enough in conversations, nods in disapproval when I’m the fly on the wall rather than the life of the party and pities me when I don’t forcefully own an idea that was originally mine.

I've been reading some blogs and articles on this topic and there are surprisingly many who are stuck in-between and can’t categorize themselves as either introverted or extroverted.
To these people I say cheers... Don’t be confused, I think the category you’re seeking is PERFECTION.

Perceptions on Purpose

Can a person have purpose without it being created? Without them or someone or something else fashioning the circumstance that causes a person to choose a purpose or think to themselves,
“hey I know,
that’s for me,
that’s what I’ll do,
that’s what I’ll be”.

What I mean to ask is, can true purpose just exist? Unequivocally? Irrevocably?

So you got to this earth and there was your purpose, shining resplendently like the North Star before your eyes. And the purpose was plain and it was certain and there were no questions or doubts surrounding it cos it was so complete and ideal and concrete. And you sped off without delay to fulfill it cos that’s your very reason for being. Can that be? Has anyone out there experienced that? Or is everyone as lost as I am? Cos EVERYONE I know that claim’s they’ve found purpose, has really just selected something they fancied and labeled it their ‘purpose’.

Do I have to just harden the fuck up and accept that that’s the way things are…or should I soldier on, endeavoring to find purpose no matter what? Maybe I’ll be the first to find it without creating it. Or, I could end up wasting an entire lifetime chasing something everyone else knows HAS to be created…and then I’ll die sad and purposeless at the end of it all with a heart full of regrets…

Ellen makes people laugh…that’s a great feature, but not a purpose.
Oprah gives people free stuff…that’s generosity, but not a purpose.
President Obama motivates a nation…that’s a skill, but not a purpose.

I’d love to ask these 3 what their true purpose is…Ellen, Oprah, Barrack, if any of you ever read this, please answer that question for me.

The apple tree makes apples which feed the land…now that’s a purpose.

“Looking good and dressing well is a necessity, Having a purpose in life is not.”
- Oscar Wilde -

Dear Future Self,

This post should’ve come first but I’m regrettably not as organized as I should be…

Ever since I can remember, I’ve had nifty notions running through my mind all day long.
And every now and then, I would jot down some thoughts, inside a book cover or on a piece of scrap paper. Then, time would pass by and on the day that I’m throwing out an old dusty book or a worn scrap of paper, I would read a notion that my past self felt the need to scribble down and be startled and amazed that I even had a thought so profound to begin with.

My past self knew things that are long lost to me, just as I know things that my future self will find invaluable.

Keeping a physical journal is too much work for someone like me but blogging is convenient. I started this blog so that future me will have some insight into who I was in the past.
I want future me to: remember who WE used to be, try not to stop writing so “future future” me will know who YOU used to be and stay forever young.

The only reason for this post is to remind me why I started posting to begin with…if I didn’t need this reminder, I wouldn’t really need this blog.
It’s the cyclic referencing loop of my life…

'Keep a diary and one day it'll keep you. '
- Mae West -

A notion about being Super-Human

E E Cummings once said, "It takes courage to grow up and turn out to be who you really are."

But are we really anything at all if there isn’t anyone around us to witness and verify our existence?

More and more people are trying desperately to believe in themselves and be all they can be in this lifetime…to extend beyond the achievements of the generations before them and leave behind a legacy worth talking about.

Humans are enthralled by the idea of possessing god-like abilities.

I’m not sure why this is so, but we all become spellbound by superheroes and mesmerized by characters that can alter time or teleport, see into the future or communicate with the dead.

On one or more occasions during our lives, our minds create scenes of superhero role-playing in which we are super-human in some form or another. Mostly, we hope that we are the only ones on the planet with this ability… it’s an inherent longing to be unique, powerful, wanted and glorified by others.

But if there was no one else in the world to witness your greatness, would you still long for it?